Joe and I met with the surgeon this morning to look at my scars and go over the surgery. Before the surgery, I had several ultrasounds to look for infected lymph nodes. At each ultra sound, there was only 1 lymph node that looked to be infected. The surgeon told me he ended up removing 34 lymph nodes during surgery. He then said 21 came back wth cancer in them. I was not prepared to hear that!!!! Trying not to cry and jump to conclusions, I knew I needed to suck it up and listen. Then he told me, this is one of the reasons the surgery was so aggressive. When he got in there, he found many lymph nodes that were hardened. He removed lymph nodes from so many sections of my neck. Most of the lymph nodes were “microscopic” in cancer. Because of the spread, the Radioactive iodine treatment, which is 6 weeks away, is very very important for me to do. This treatment’s job is to kill any remaining cancer in my thyroid tissue or neck lymph nodes. 7-10 days after the radio active iodine treatment, I will have a full body scan to see if the cancer has spread to any other part of my body. Please pray God removes all my cancer with this treatment. In rare cases thyroid cancer will spread to the lungs or bones. Pray He heals me completely of cancer.
There are a few side effects so far. My bottom lip has no nerves on the right side. When I smile, my lip does not move. It looks funny. My neck is complelely numb from the center to the right side. He thinks in several months, I should regain movement on my lip and the neck should regain feeling. My voice is not very strong. The kids can only hear me when I am within a few feet from them. When I cry, my voice is pretty much paralyzed…… this is actually a good side effect. because I try to cry and talk but I can’t so I have to stop crying in order to talk. I think Joe has enjoyed how quickly it causes my tears to clear up. I prefer to talk than to cry. Another benefit of the voice issue is I can not raise my voice for my kids….. teaches you real fast to get up and go talk to them face to face…. I have a lot of physical therapy ahead of me at home. Mainly shoulder and neck exercises and a lot of gum chewing. He didn’t give me any physical therap for my lip so mom and I came up with our own home grown therapy. If I chew gum every day maybe that will help strengthen my bottom lip. Between that and kissing Joe, my lip should be back to normal in no time ……
After the appointment I cried in the car and then Joe and I prayed and talked. My biggest struggle through this right now is fear, and learning to truly take this one day at a time. With Your help Lord, I commit to only taking this thing one day at a time. When I mess up, I will crawl back to you Lord acknowledging my sinfulness and weakness and get back up, trust You and hold Your hand. When I am holding Your hand Lord, it is because You are the one holding on to mine. My sinful heart has never been so aparent to me.
I need to go play with my kids….. right now they are staring at me……
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